Your Attitude Is Screaming
By Ke O Agile Khiba
Posted Monday, February 21, 2005
There is more attitude around than the 'traditional 'positive / negative attitude. This issue's topic will expose you to the other kind of attitude. You will also learn about the significant role attitude in the making your world go round!
As you read through, you will begin to understand what the components of attitude are and how can use these to have an attitude that serves you. That's exactly want you need, right?
Okay, let's take an in-depth look at attitude.
What is it?
It is a way of responding to our environment that is derived mostly from our generalizations about others and the system. We adopt and express a certain attitude in order to preserve ours was from" harm" or to maintain a preferred personal status quo. Attitude is always expressed in relations to others. (others, goals, system ) outside of oneself
What you may not have known is that your attitude says a lot about your self-esteem, self-acceptance and self-affirmation. More than it says anything about others! Your attitude tells the world about your self-esteem, self-acceptance as well as your self-affirmation.
Self-esteem is judgement of self-worth, resulting in peace or lack there of with self and others! It presents as the presence or absence of enthusiasm and sense of purpose.
Self-acceptance is reconciliation with self refusing to be in an adversarial relationship with self.
Self-affirmation is saying yes to yourself! Refusing to berate yourself unnecessarily without being haughty or pompous and self-deceived. When these three are congruent and aligned, you have an attitude that serves you well! And it shows.
At any given time your attitude is a result of an interaction between your outcomes expectancies and your efficacy beliefs. These two determine what kind of attitude you express to wards others (others, goals,system). What are they?
Outcomes expectancies are expectations of a specific result, which influence the choice of action to be taken.
Efficacy beliefs are beliefs about your capabilities to organize & execute courses required to produce certain results.
There are four ways in which an interaction between efficacy beliefs and outcomes expectancies can take place:
-High Outcomes Expectancies lead to an attitude that spurs you to do something to get a result.
-Low Outcomes Expectancies leads to avoiding certain tasks/actions or chalenges
-High Efficacy Beliefs lead to being prepared to take on a challenge.
-Low Efficacy Beliefs lead to an "I won't be able to do it" attitude.
Changing your attitude starts with an understanding of those four interactions, it works.
Suppose we use an example to demonstrate how it works for you. Let's suppose you are faced with a situation or challenge.
* your feeling is that you are not equipped to deal with it (low efficacy belief)
* but it is something that can be done (high outcomes expectancy)
*your assessment: "I'm wrong person" (self-pity, low efficacy belief), despondency and self-devaluation (negative self-talk)
Can you see how you develop your attitude? But, you want to know how to change your attitude, right?
Easy! You begin by asking:
a. Does the present attitude serve me well?
b. What is the source of this attitude:
- Low OE High EB
- High OE High EB
- Low OE Low EB
- High OE Low EB
c. Where do I need to make changes?
- Efficacy Beliefs
- Outcome Expectancies
d. Do I have the appropriate resources to effect the change?
Four questions are all you need if you want to change your attitude.
If, while you're reading this you find yourself thinking:"So what, I don't give a hoot!", ask yourself the above questions. And do the right thing.
About the Author
Ke o agile is an NLP Coach as well as editor and publisher of In TheZone (http://inthezone.port5.com), an NLP focused ezine that coaches creating an abundance lifestyle. Ke o agile also blogs at (http://inthesuccesszone.blogspot.com/atom.xml)